Emails
by Rustblood
Summary: Eridan isn't very good at flirting, so he goes with an alternative route of wooing his interest. Humanstuck. College AU. Gift for user Dave Stridick.
1. Chapter 1

this is for user Dave Stridick, and i am so sorry for how late it is. u c u  
real life is a nuisance.

* * *

When the first file showed up in his inbox, Sollux was automatically interested. Mainly because it was from Eridan, and their relationship was entirely uncivil. So while they would occasionally bitch at each other in the hallway, and sometimes argued in class, there was little, if any, reason for Eridan to send him an email. Perhaps it was a virus? Maybe a mistake.

So he opened it. He had plenty of protection on his computer if it was a bug, which was pretty much the worst thing he could even consider being on the message. And...

No explanation offered, no subject on the header. Just an extremely high definition image of the Ampora stretched out in all his glory on a bed, a charming blush coloring his tanned cheeks and his eyes half lidded in lust. And, very tastefully, his leg was positioned to block the view of his groin, which sort of made it somewhat okay?

No it didn't.

Sollux slammed the laptop closed, his own cheeks burning crimson, head whipping around to make sure no one else in the library had seen what was on his computer. No, but they'd certainly picked up on his overly dramatic closing of the computer, and now he was getting curious looks...ugh. Jesus fucking Christ. For lack of a better reaction, he got to his feet so he could hurry out of the library with his head ducked in shame.

Only once he was safely back in his dorm did he allow himself to relax, setting the laptop down on his desk and sitting his ass down in front of it. Okay. So. He had a picture of Eridan Ampora, naked as a fucking baby, on his laptop. Why. The Captor hesitated a moment before slowly lifting the lid, the screen brightening again. Apprehensively, he clicked the bumblebee icon to open his account, and _yepthereitwas_.

Why the fuck had Eridan sent him this? He stared at the image, brow furrowed slightly, trying to identify a purpose without actually examining the image. Despite his best efforts, unfortunately, he caught himself following the curve of his classmate's stomach, his hips… He would have been lying to himself if he didn't acknowledge the other boy had a nice body. But that still didn't answer why.

The cursor moved to the reply button at the top of the email and hovered, unsure. Did he really want to have a discussion about this? Rarely could he even ask about the weather without the Ampora having a hissy fit. He couldn't imagine inquiring about the image would be taken well. Maybe he'd sent it to the wrong person? As far as Sollux knew, Eridan wasn't overly skilled with computers, and it could have easily just been a mistake.

Which was great blackmail, he noted, but a frown appeared on his face at the idea of spreading this around the campus. Okay, so yeah. Eridan was a massive tool and probably deserved it. But it wasn't like the Ampora had that many friends to begin with… this wouldn't do wonders for his already-lacking popularity. Sollux wasn't sure he felt right about threatening it.

And, hey. Maybe if he had the swimmer's body, he might be sending emails with his nudes, too.

The cursor moved to the delete email button, and he swore he was going to click it…

_Saved._

Who would know?


	2. Chapter 2

He ignored Eridan during class, which was far harder than it sounded. The Texas drawl was a distraction at the best of times, but every time he opened his stupid mouth, Sollux was immediately reminded of the email. Lips pursed, the Captor refused to look back at the asshole, keeping his gaze solely on the professor until they were _mercifully _released. Thank God. He was so done with this. At least the class only met twice a week, so he didn't have to hear or see Ampora until Thursday.

Gathering up his laptop and backpack, the brunette got to his feet, rushing towards the door -

Of course. He hadn't meant to bump into Eridan, much less knock him off his feet, but there they were. And if the glare he was getting was any indication, the Ampora was most displeased with him. "In a fuckin' hurry?" he snapped, picking himself up off the floor to brush himself off, the motion far more dramatic than truly necessary. "Were you fuckin' raised in a barn? You're supposed to apologize when you run into people, you lispin douche canal."

Sollux offered an eye roll, turning back towards the door again. "Yeah, whatever. Watch where you're going next time." He made his great escape, leaving the other boy to sputter indignantly about his lack of manners. Yeah. He didn't give a shit. He felt vaguely guilty about the fall, but it was just as much Eridan's fault as it was his own, so he didn't feel it warranted an apology.

Perhaps he should have, though. Because maybe this was some sort of revenge.

He hadn't immediately gotten on his computer, heading out to grab lunch with Aradia. It was probably a good hour and a half after class before he ventured back to the dorms, but still. He had not been close to expecting another email.

The Captor stared at it, bold next to the checked messages, his hand frozen on the mouse. Should he?... It couldn't be an accident twice, right? But why the fuck?... He was pretty sure their relationship had been confirmed over the incident in class. Why would Eridan be sending him nudes?

Perhaps it wasn't a nude, though. Perhaps he'd checked his outbox and realized he'd sent the original email to the wrong person, and this was an apology and a plea for him to delete it. Yeah. That was probably it.

That was not it.

Eridan had a really, really nice ass.

Sollux licked his lips without thinking, staring openly. Wow. He… No. No, no, this was so weird and confusing, why the fuck was Ampora sending him this? They weren't friends. They weren't even acquaintances. Eridan hated him. He hated Eridan. This… thing, whatever it was, should not be happening.

But he saved the picture, anyway.


	3. Chapter 3

Sollux refused to admit it, but he might have spent most of the night refreshing his email. Maybe he was only getting one a day? He certainly wasn't going to ask. That would prove to Eridan that not only was he getting the emails, he was looking forward to them, and while Sollux wasn't entirely sure what strange game the Ampora was playing, he wasn't going to give him that victory.

The hours stretched on, though, and he had to accept that maybe he wasn't going to get another one till morning. Perhaps not ever again, he had no fucking idea. It wasn't like he was being consulted.

As he was thinking that he should probably give up and go to bed, though, a new message appeared in his inbox. Success. Clicking the email, he waited for the pictur -

A video file.

_OhmyGod_.

Flustered before he even opened it, Sollux floundered to find his headphones. His roommate might be asleep, but he wasn't going to risk Karkat waking up to… well.

There was some shuffling and he winced at the noise, but the sleeping Vantas didn't stir. Thank fucking God, because he was already getting antsy. He wasn't sure he was willing to wait for the other boy to fall back asleep.

Plugging the headphones in, he barely got them over his ears before he was pressing play, eyes glued to the screen.

There was some feedback and the camera wiggled slightly, trained on a bed that Sollux recognized as from one of the more high end dorms, the headboard piled high with pillows. Unsurprising; the Amporas were loaded, from what he'd heard. Of course Eridan would be at the expensive dorms, with their separated bedrooms and private bathrooms. Must make weird shit like this a whole lot easier.

The movement ceased as the camera was left on the tripod, and Eridan came into sight, offering an irritated sigh If the way he was avoiding looking at the lens was an indication, he was embarrassed, but he settled down on the bed nonetheless, getting comfortable against the pillows. "This is real fuckin' stupid. You better appreciate it, dickwad." His eyes briefly flicked up to the camera, his legs adjusted carefully so at the moment, nothing especially private was visible. Which was fine. Sollux suspected it would come soon enough. Anyway, the remark was enough to garner a smile from the programmer, vaguely amused. That was more like the ED he knew.

The Ampora reached briefly to his nightstand, and Sollux narrowed his eyes briefly before recognizing the retrieved item as lube. Eridan made a face at the cold as he squeezed it into his hand, over dramatic, perhaps, for the camera's benefit, shifting slightly where he sat.

Almost reluctantly, the other boy lowered the bent leg blocking sight, his cheeks stained a vibrant red. Slender fingers wrapped around an already half hard dick, stroking slowly, and Eridan let out a quivering sigh, forcing himself to relax. His other hand slid over his thigh, to his ass, and the tanned student bit his lip, hesitating, before working the first slicked finger inside himself.

Sollux was glad he was only wearing boxers, because his jeans would have been uncomfortable at this point. The Captor palmed himself absently through the thin cloth, refusing to look away as another digit was added, and Eridan huffed a quiet moan as he scissored and curled them, still brushing his other hand over his length.

Sollux was vaguely disappointed by the lack of noise, but perhaps he just needed to be patient. Or maybe Eridan was just quiet in bed. He wasn't exactly well versed on the Ampora's bedside manner, but he supposed the only way to find out was to keep watching. This was highly educational and all that.

Pulling his fingers away, the Ampora offered another shaky sigh, eyes flicking to the camera, expression almost shy, clearly nervous as his hand slipped under the pillow behind him. Sollux paused at the slender vibrator, somewhat surprised at the size, before the thought struck him that Eridan might be a virgin. Fuck, maybe this was the first time he'd even used a toy before, Sollux had no idea. But that would explain the nerves; the Ampora didn't seem like someone who got stage fright, so the lack of experience would probably be a more logical conclusion to make.

As he was considering that, though, the video had continued to play, and Eridan took a deep breath as he slid the slim purple vibrator inside himself, face flushed dark. Sollux only realized he was holding his breath, too, when the toy was completely inside his classmate, and he let it out in a hiss, sliding his hand inside his boxers to stroke himself. Damn. Eridan hesitated, his thumb at the base of the toy, before he took another shaky breath and flicked it on.

"Fuck!" Eridan gasped, going rigid, toes curling in the sheets, eyes clenching shut as the toy buzzed. The pillows were pretty much the only thing keeping him upright and in sight of the camera, and he offered a trembling moan, legs spread and spasming. His hand found his length again, pumping, and Sollux matched his pace, biting back his own noise. Karkat would absolutely murder him if he woke up to this.

"Haah -Sol -" The Ampora squirmed, another moan escaping, and Sollux jerked in surprise despite himself. This was… really directed at him? Like… he knew…. somewhat that it couldn't be an accident anymore, but…

A pleading whine returned his focus to the video, and he admired the obvious toning in the other boy's stomach. The constant swim practice clearly had some benefits, and Sollux desperately wanted to appreciate said benefits personally.

Eridan came seconds before his viewer, a muffled moan escaping behind his hand, back arching. After a few moments, he shakily pulled the vibrator out, flicking it off and tossing it onto the floor. The Ampora just about sagged on the bed, breathing heavily, eyes closing while he rearranged himself mentally.

Despite the fact Sollux was still recovering from his own orgasm, when Eridan's roommate hammered on the wall and told him to shut the fuck up, he laughed.


	4. Chapter 4

Shuffling down the hallway, he was grateful it was late enough that no one was out. He wasn't keen on his shame becoming public.

A groan of dismay escaped when he opened the locker door, spotting a telltale pile of clothes in an open locker. So someone else was there. Fucking fantastic, he had definitely wanted to share the showers while he cleaned jizz off himself. Wonderful.

Still, nothing he could do.

Dropping his clothes off in another locker, he turned to the doors separating the changing room from the showers themselves, pushing it open and stepping inside.

Fuck.

He and Eridan locked eyes, and both immediately froze. He could practically see the gears turning in the swimmer's head, and Sollux watched his eyes flick towards the door behind the Captor, like he was looking for a quick escape. Without really thinking about it, Sollux shifted slightly so he was blocking the opening completely, and Eridan's cheeks colored at the realization that his thoughts of running had been so easily read.

Pointedly, the Texan turned his back to the taller boy, thus giving the Captor an excellent view of his ass. Pictures did not do him justice, Sollux realized, raking an eye over the other's figure. Jeez. That hardly seemed fair.

Honestly, though, Sollux was more focused on the issue at hand. He was at an absolute loss. He'd literally just gotten done jerking it to the Ampora, but...well, they weren't really on the greatest terms. What could he even say? Should he even talk at all? Should he… ask him about the emails?

"Didn't anyone ever tell you it's rude to stare?" Eridan was clearly annoyed, tossing a dirty look over his shoulder. "I'm not here for your viewin' pleasure, asshole."

Sollux forced a snort and an eye roll, choosing a shower near the door and a respectable distance from Eridan. "As if. I was just wondering why the Princess wasn't showering in his own dorm."

"Not that it's any of your fuckin' business, but my roomie was usin' ours. Now if you wouldn't mind, I am attemptin' to get clean. I understand you aren't well-versed on the subject, but still. Not all of us can work the 'smelly computer geek' look."

What a prick.

They fell into stubborn silence, Sollux deliberately focusing on washing himself rather than thinking of the Ampora. He was not going to check him out. Was. Not.

He heard the other shower being turned off and bit back a sigh of relief. Finally, he was leaving. Now at least he could rela -

"Whatthefuck!" He yelped in surprise, nearly jumping out of his skin as his ass was firmly squeezed. Whirling around, he only caught a glimpse of the Ampora as he exited, evidently not sticking around to see the reaction.

What. The. Fuck.

Sollux stared after him, stunned, not even sure how to go about chasing him down. What the Hell could he even say to him? 'Did you grab my ass? Why are you sending me porn?' What sort of questions were those? Why was this his life?

The obvious answer to the hypothetical inquiries was that Eridan was interested in him. But the mixed signals were confusing, to say the least; maybe he just wanted sex, and no relationship? Or perhaps he was like a child on the playground, mean to the kid he liked. Or maybe he was just determined to drive the Captor absolutely insane.

Ugh. Sollux frowned, turning off the water. He was going to get to the bottom of this shit. He was done with this game.


	5. Chapter 5

"Does Ampora ever talk about me?" He tried to sound casual, but it was a weird question. He knew it, and Feferi knew it, the dark-skinned Medical student giving him an entirely puzzled look.

"Well, I mean. I gue-ss," She shrugged a bit, leaning on the counter. He'd hunted her down at the coffee shop just off campus. She didn't really need the job, from what he understood, but she claimed she liked working. Whatever. "Normally it's more like complaining, you know?" She offered an apologetic smile, lifting a hand vaguely. "But yeah. He talks about you."

Okay. "What about?" He really hated how desperate he sounded, but he was so fucking sick of this weird game. He'd woken up to another picture, and he hated himself for saving it onto his computer, and he hated Eridan for this stupidity.

"Uh." Feferi's nose wrinkled in thought, her bottom lip sticking out in a half pout as she considered. "Well. Usually it's nothing nice, Sollux. I don't generally pay that much attention. Why?" Her expression turned from contemplative to suspicious, though the hint of a smile suggested she had her own theory to the sudden interest in her friend. Ugh.

"No reason," Sollux forced his expression to remain neutral. "I just heard a rumor…" Oh, yes, there it was. A spark of true interest. It was a terrible habit that Nepeta had gotten her into, but the sophomore was in love with gossip.

"What rumor? About Eridan?" She leaned forward further on the counter, brown eyes practically glittering. "Is it good?"

"I dunno," The programmer shrugged vaguely, feigning disinterest. "I just heard that he might be interested in me, and I wanted to make sure it wasn't true before his reputation got slammed." Yes, so considerate. He definitely did not want his ass at all. He was simply a concerned friend. Acquaintance. Classmate. Peer. Friend was kind of a stretch.

Feferi practically squealed with delight, bouncing a bit behind the counter, mane of wild hair bouncing in its ponytail. "No wa-y! Do you think? I mean, he has seemed a little less angry when he talks about you lately." Which he supposed translated to affection when it came to the Ampora. It was unlikely Eridan would ever gush about anyone he was into, so 'a little less angry' probably meant a lot coming from him. "I could ask -"

Oh, God. "FF, you're batshit if you think he's going to just fucking come out and admit to that." Sollux shook his head fervently, expression vaguely scornful. "He's just going to get pissed off at me, and then I'll have to listen to him bitch all class tomorrow in that stupid accent."

She rolled her eyes, a snort escaping. "Oh, please. As if you don't lo-ove that Texas twang," Her wink and grin made his cheeks warm, indignantly offended at the truth of her comment. That was not the point.

"Yeah, right." He wished he had something more clever to say, but his mind had gone blank in embarrassment at the comment. Feferi snorted again, hiding a giggle behind her hand, and he scowled, resisting the urge to cross his arms over his chest defensively. He was not going to confirm this stupidity. "Just get me my coffee." He was so done with this conversation. Evidently she took his embarrassment as confirmation, because she burst out in entirely inelegant laughter, turning away to make the demanded drink.

"Yeah, yeah, Sol. But you know, if you were, you know," she glanced over her shoulder, grin still in place. "Interested. You should let him know. Whether or not he is, he'd get all flustered, and it'll be adorabubble, I swear." She really needed to stop watching that stupid Squiddle cartoon, if she was starting to use fish puns in public.

"I'm not." the Captor said firmly, but he was pretty sure they both knew he was lying.


	6. Chapter 6

Sollux nearly jumped out of his skin when his phone went off in one of his numerous computer courses, getting a disapproving look from his teacher. Possibly because his ringtone was the introduction to "Bee Movie", which he acknowledged was likely very distracting to the rest of the class.

Apparently he looked suitably guilty, though, because the teacher turned around again to continue helping another student, giving the Captor the chance to check and see who was harassing him this time. Hopefully it wasn't just Kanaya's laptop acting up aga -

How the fuck did he get his phone number?

Not that the programmer was complaining, because he definitely was not. He thoroughly appreciated the fact Eridan was keeping him well stocked on pictures. But he'd have to examine the new image more thoroughly after class.

He turned off the sound on his cell as an afterthought, placing it screen down on the desk next to him, hands returning to the keyboard -

_Buzz buzz._

Fuck.

Sollux flatly refused to pick up his phone, despite the fact that he knew perfectly well what type of messages he was receiving, ignoring the glances from his classmates at the noisy vibrations. He wasn't exactly doing this deliberately, so he refused to feel bad for it. Sure, he could shut the phone off, but then he wouldn't be able to count how many lewd images he could expect.

It was ten, by the way. Eridan sent him ten pictures during class.


	7. Chapter 7

Eridan could see Sollux staring at him out of the corner of his eye, and he was equal parts uncomfortable and amused. He'd fuckin' earned this damn reaction. The lack of response altogether was nerve-wracking, and while he couldn't help but feel nervous under the scrutiny, he was at least relieved that his messages were having some sort of effect.

Even if the other boy was making this extremely obvious. Jesus fuck, he was so socially inept; how the hell did he have any friends at all? Just fucking staring…

The Ampora glanced over, jolting a bit when he locked eyes with his interest, quickly looking forward again. He could feel his cheeks warm slightly, but refused to react otherwise, forcing his gaze to remain on the professor pacing in the front of the room. It was like Sollux was trying to be as embarrassing as possible; other classmates were starting to notice the fact he was studying him. _Ugh_.

Narrowing his eyes, Eridan focused harder on the professor. He was not going to humor that douche of a programming student and look over again. Absolutely not.

When a paper football smacked against his cheek, though, his glare was reflex. Sollux just smirked in response, finally turning his weird dual-toned gaze away. Offering an irritated hiss under his breath, Eridan picked up the small triangle of lined paper from where it had landed on his desk.

The more pathetic, romantic part of him hoped it was an invitation to coffee or something. He knew it probably wasn't, but aside from the questionable aim, it would have been a fairly cute way of bringing the subject up, he thought.

So he unfolded it, revealing -

_Niice a22._

Jesus fuckin' Christ. The Ampora didn't even try to be subtle, crumpling it up and throwing it as hard as paper would go at the irritant next to him. Ridiculous. He shouldn't even be surprised; obviously someone as awkward as Captor would have no concept of romancing someone. Which was partially why he was going about this whole thing like he was. If Sollux had just asked him out to begin with...

Another football hit him in the face, and Eridan barely resisted the urge whip a pen at the other boy. Huffing, he unfolded the paper, already expecting something stupid -

_Diinner_?

The Ampora froze in his seat, stunned, not even sure what to do now that his 'plan' had 'succeeded'. OhmyGod. He could feel his face heating up, and he willed himself to move, to do anything, because he could feel Sollux staring at him again, but all the swimmer could do was gape at the scrap of paper in his hands. Shit. Oh, fuck, he wasn't sure he could do this; he wasn't exactly skilled in the matter of relationships, and he hadn't seriously expected his 'flirting' to work. At best he expected a quickie for his efforts, but he hadn't genuinely…

Clumsily, he floundered for his pen, effectively knocking it onto the floor from the desk in his haste to grab it. So smooth. Snatching it from the floor, Eridan flatly refused to look at the Captor, because he knew perfectly well he was amused and he wasn't quite sure he could resist snapping at him if he saw that stupid smirk.

The end of the pen tapped against his cheek nervously as he considered, eyes back on the date request. What should he say? Well, yes, obviously; he hadn't been sending the nudes for his health. But phrasing was important, or so he figured. And hey, maybe he was making Sollux nervous with his hesitation in a response. One could only hope.

A quick glance at the clock confirmed class was nearly over, and he let out a huffed sigh. Okay. Carefully, his usual dramatic script curled on the paper, stark contrast to the unsurprisingly casual handwriting of his peer.

_pick me up at sevven_

Still, he didn't give the slip of paper back, collecting his things as their professor wrapped up the lecture. Grabbing his backpack from the floor, he left the note on his desk, trying not to bolt like he so desperately wanted to. Sollux knew to check it, right? He wouldn't take him not handing it back to him as a refusal. He'd seen him write an answer on the paper, so he must know to at least glance at it… anyway, the Captor was probably curious, right? Right. He was the one who asked for the date, after all, so clearly he was intrigued. But Eridan didn't want to seem too interested, and he certainly wasn't going to encourage the paper football method of communication, but… maybe just leaving it on his own desk had been a bad call.

Too late now to do anything about the delivery, though. Stepping into the hallway, Eridan didn't go far, stepping close to the wall and peeking through the glass next to the door. A few of their classmates glanced at him with varying degrees of interest, but they were easy to ignore, because Sollux had collected the paper already and that took Eridan's full attention.

He couldn't see the other boy's face from where he was, but when the Captor glanced over his shoulder towards the door, Eridan jerked back. He'd really like to hope that the other student hadn't seen him peering in, but he was pretty sure he'd effectively embarrassed himself. Good going, Ampora, that didn't seem desperate _at all._

Hastily he made his escape, unwilling to face the other boy and get called out on his somewhat pathetic behavior. That would probably come soon enough.

After all, he'd see him again at seven, provided things worked out as planned.


End file.
